The Kidversation Skill

It never fails, when I pick up Maddox from school and ask about his day the response is always “Good”.

• How was school? “good”
• What did you learn? “stuff”
• Anything crazy happen? “No”
• What did you have for lunch? “food”

You catch my drift.   At first, I thought it was just school related questions.  But I get the same responses after soccer practice, watching a movie, or just basic conversations.   I wanted to know what was going on in little dude’s life.   (mind you, we don’t have this issue with Kennedy.  Sometimes it takes 20 minutes to recap her day, even though none of it is relatable but it is engaging and as dramatic as a daytime drama.)

Towards the end of last year, I changed my approach with Maddox and forced him to share a bit more just with how I was asking the questions.

• What did coach say at the end of practice?
• Tell me one thing you learned today a school?
• Was pizza for lunch today?
• What made you proud today?

Although it was not a drastic change, he is conversing more.  It is funny how the assumption of telling him what he had for lunch he immediately would talk about food for 5 minutes after.   I have found to ensure I learn what is happening in his world, I must link my questions to emotions, ask them in ways that are open minded, and start a conversation.

Do you have a kid that has a one word response routine?    Let me know about it.